"Why I Left A Church"...
From an article by Alan Jamieson
Male 37 years
I haven't been to church for more than six months. Some people say that you cannot be a Christian in isolation - you need a Christian community. I couldn't agree more.
The reason why I left church is not because I wanted to separate myself from a community of believers, but because the church I was going to wasn't functioning as such a community. A Christian community is exactly what I am after - but is not what I have found in church.
I have attended Pentecostal church services for many years and have never liked the worship - since to me worship isn't singing songs and singing songs isn't worshipping. The preaching, usually, is banal at best. I find that a very occasional communion service with watered-down raspberry juice is a fairly lame imitation of what should be a profound celebration of a Christian mystery. And I am something of an introvert, so I don't like hanging around afterwards for fellowship.
I find Pentecostal church services rather content-less. The theological merit of most songs is dubious, and much of the preaching (in my church at least) is anecdotal and only scratches the surface of Scripture and tradition.
I am after a community which can take the good things in the Pentecostal experience (mainly its insistence that every believer can and should have a direct encounter with God through his Holy Spirit, and that all believers are empowered for service) while exploring other Christian traditions and expressions - such as liturgical prayer, silence and meditation. I hope for a group that can discuss faith with theological depth and insight - where the teaching mines the depths of the Scriptures for their treasure.
I left church not because I do not believe in church, but because what passes for church falls so far short of what is possible, and what I hope for, that to go on a Sunday morning is simply depressing. After I read Dave Tomlinson's book The Post-Evangelical I recognised that there are many others, like me, who give up church-going because it seems the church is going nowhere.
Female 43 years
Weddings, funerals, and maybe an occasional Easter or Christmas service sums up my appearances in church these days.
I have attended church for most of my life. At 15 years of age I became a 'born again Christian' finding a living relationship with Jesus Christ. For the most part I attended charismatic style churches and was privileged to receive some excellent teaching from scripture and befriend many good people.
Not the sort to look for trouble or to step out of the mould for the sake of it, it was strange to find myself growing uncomfortable with the way I perceived church. As a leader of a women's group I met once a month with the church hierarchy. It was at these meetings that I became aware of the politics and orchestration of situations within the church.
It was often apparent that sermons were designed to motivate people for a coming event or to help bring in the money for the building fund. Much time, energy and money was spent in the building up of church plant. It often seemed that projects were the goal, rather than a desire to be led by the Holy Spirit and used by him.
I also felt a growing discomfort about the performance nature of the Sunday services. In Sunday morning services those musicians and worship leaders deemed to be 'good enough' performed at the front. In the family service the Childrens' Church leaders organised a presentation where each set of leaders tried to outdo the previous ones.
Over months of pondering these things, I decided that church walls tend to protect Christians from the world and get in the way of their interaction with ordinary people.
Churches are full of people who sit and watch the front. Faith is not given much opportunity to grow and for many, there is little opportunity to use the talents God has given them. There is too much hierarchy, too much assessing the spirituality of others and too much controlling on behalf of God.
Our family stopped attending the 'church in walls'. We would come home from church frustrated and cross and found it was better not to go at all. It was a lonely venture. Mostly people didn't understand. Those we had considered our friends no longer contacted us and we accepted that we were now not part of the 'club'. Ultimately it doesn't matter that people didn't understand, or that now we were in a 'box' labelled 'backslider'. What matters is that we stay in communication with God - listen to his voice, walk with him and obey him.
Male 70 years
I'm really finding it difficult to stay connected with the church. I've just about had enough of it.
For a long time, at every local level throughout New Zealand, it has impressed me as being thoroughly anachronistic and irrelevant. In the preaching of the church the great social issues of the day are simply not on the agenda.
God is moved to the depths of his being by the plight of the poor and his anger and wrath are upon those who create poverty and upon those who ignore it. That message is central in the prophets and the gospel.
Do the clergy not care? Do the office bearers not care? If local church leaders want to become relevant, they must begin to listen - they must begin to engage in some elementary research to inform their preaching and all their work.
Disillusioned, I've been disengaging for some years now. Maybe I should quit. But how can I give up completely? I am torn apart. I love the people, the office bearers and the clergy - but I also love the community outside the church, especially the poor in the community.
The institutional church is so frustrating. It's simply driving me crazy and making me very angry. I want to sit down and weep.
Female 36 years
For the last seven years I have attended a Pentecostal church. I came to realise that my theology differed somewhat from that of some of the people I sat next to week after week, but I never felt I had the freedom to express these differences openly for fear of being called deceived (which did happen) or being branded a heretic.
I also had some difficulty accepting the autocratic style of leadership.
Church should be a place where a person is nurtured, and encouraged. A place which is safe, where one can express one's creativity and ask questions without fear. Alas, all too often it is a place which is narrow in its thinking, suspicious, and not accepting of people's eccentricities.
So for now I no longer attend church. Now, when I meet with like-minded (and even not-like-minded) individuals who are lovers of Christ, I say this is church. You don't have to be in a church building to pray with others, worship with others, laugh or cry with others, but you do need to be in a relationship with people.
After being in the 'safe' confines of the church for so long (over fifteen years) leaving was a big decision. Suddenly the boundary lines that church culture has in place (telling you what you can and cannot do) were no longer there. It is a risky business, but satisfying when you make decisions for yourself, rather than having them made for you.
Male 25 years
My decision to leave church was a necessary step in a journey which started almost three years ago when I realised that I had a truckload of Christian knowledge and yet didn't really know what I believed. This was a little unsettling for someone who had been brought up a Christian and had followed it through diligently, including going on three outreaches overseas.
Church became less and less a place for me to grow and be inspired, and more of a place for me to endure irrelevant teachings and worship which I couldn't seem to participate in. Church, for me, became part of the problem rather than part of the solution.
It is as if I'm going through a spiritual adolescence, wanting to grow up. The church seems to want to keep me in a dependent parent/child relationship. I rebel against that pressure but, like some teenagers, don't have the strength to claim my freedom to grow and take responsibility while I'm still attending church.
Therefore, unless I wished to remain a child, I needed to leave 'home'. Hopefully, as I grow stronger, I will be able to enter into a more adult to adult relationship with the church, without feeling overpowered by the inherent (and, dare I say it, un-Christlike) power of that institution. If Jesus came today, could he bring himself to be aligned with the institution of Christianity?
When I decided to leave the church, it was one of the most freeing, yet most scary decisions I've made thus far. I decided to throw away the composite of realities that had been given to me to believe in, and discover what was actually real for me. What was scary was that I had very little reality with God to call my own. I have truly had to start again from scratch.
Female 53 years
In church I feel like I'm going over old ground. I feel I've moved on from what is being discussed. When I return to church it is for the communion service alone. The sermons don't even touch me any more, they seem to have no substance. When I look around and see the same people still sitting in the pews with the same things being discussed I realise that if I do start attending church regularly again I will become frustrated and that will only lead to criticism which I don't want to get into.
Once all my energy went into working in groups within the church, and that felt right and proper. But now I feel God wants me out in the community working alongside everyday people sharing my gifts, where people are interested in what I have to share rather than fighting me for my differences.
I do miss the singing at church, and the sharing of my faith with others, but I feel deeply sad that the church has not been able to move fast enough to keep up with the changes that have occurred in the 20th century.
I still believe that God created the world and bestowed his gifts on his people; we live each moment in his blessings. I believe that Jesus is the saviour of the world and is constantly redeeming his people. I believe God's Holy Spirit works through me in all that I do with other people. I believe his light goes out to those I work with and that people catch the wonder and joy and power. They become curious about what I have to share, without me having to speak in a Christian language to them.
May God continue to be with all those who have left the church not really wanting to, but feeling that they have to, rather than staying constantly frustrated with the possibility of becoming very critical.
From an article by Alan Jamieson
Male 37 years
I haven't been to church for more than six months. Some people say that you cannot be a Christian in isolation - you need a Christian community. I couldn't agree more.
The reason why I left church is not because I wanted to separate myself from a community of believers, but because the church I was going to wasn't functioning as such a community. A Christian community is exactly what I am after - but is not what I have found in church.
I have attended Pentecostal church services for many years and have never liked the worship - since to me worship isn't singing songs and singing songs isn't worshipping. The preaching, usually, is banal at best. I find that a very occasional communion service with watered-down raspberry juice is a fairly lame imitation of what should be a profound celebration of a Christian mystery. And I am something of an introvert, so I don't like hanging around afterwards for fellowship.
I find Pentecostal church services rather content-less. The theological merit of most songs is dubious, and much of the preaching (in my church at least) is anecdotal and only scratches the surface of Scripture and tradition.
I am after a community which can take the good things in the Pentecostal experience (mainly its insistence that every believer can and should have a direct encounter with God through his Holy Spirit, and that all believers are empowered for service) while exploring other Christian traditions and expressions - such as liturgical prayer, silence and meditation. I hope for a group that can discuss faith with theological depth and insight - where the teaching mines the depths of the Scriptures for their treasure.
I left church not because I do not believe in church, but because what passes for church falls so far short of what is possible, and what I hope for, that to go on a Sunday morning is simply depressing. After I read Dave Tomlinson's book The Post-Evangelical I recognised that there are many others, like me, who give up church-going because it seems the church is going nowhere.
Female 43 years
Weddings, funerals, and maybe an occasional Easter or Christmas service sums up my appearances in church these days.
I have attended church for most of my life. At 15 years of age I became a 'born again Christian' finding a living relationship with Jesus Christ. For the most part I attended charismatic style churches and was privileged to receive some excellent teaching from scripture and befriend many good people.
Not the sort to look for trouble or to step out of the mould for the sake of it, it was strange to find myself growing uncomfortable with the way I perceived church. As a leader of a women's group I met once a month with the church hierarchy. It was at these meetings that I became aware of the politics and orchestration of situations within the church.
It was often apparent that sermons were designed to motivate people for a coming event or to help bring in the money for the building fund. Much time, energy and money was spent in the building up of church plant. It often seemed that projects were the goal, rather than a desire to be led by the Holy Spirit and used by him.
I also felt a growing discomfort about the performance nature of the Sunday services. In Sunday morning services those musicians and worship leaders deemed to be 'good enough' performed at the front. In the family service the Childrens' Church leaders organised a presentation where each set of leaders tried to outdo the previous ones.
Over months of pondering these things, I decided that church walls tend to protect Christians from the world and get in the way of their interaction with ordinary people.
Churches are full of people who sit and watch the front. Faith is not given much opportunity to grow and for many, there is little opportunity to use the talents God has given them. There is too much hierarchy, too much assessing the spirituality of others and too much controlling on behalf of God.
Our family stopped attending the 'church in walls'. We would come home from church frustrated and cross and found it was better not to go at all. It was a lonely venture. Mostly people didn't understand. Those we had considered our friends no longer contacted us and we accepted that we were now not part of the 'club'. Ultimately it doesn't matter that people didn't understand, or that now we were in a 'box' labelled 'backslider'. What matters is that we stay in communication with God - listen to his voice, walk with him and obey him.
Male 70 years
I'm really finding it difficult to stay connected with the church. I've just about had enough of it.
For a long time, at every local level throughout New Zealand, it has impressed me as being thoroughly anachronistic and irrelevant. In the preaching of the church the great social issues of the day are simply not on the agenda.
God is moved to the depths of his being by the plight of the poor and his anger and wrath are upon those who create poverty and upon those who ignore it. That message is central in the prophets and the gospel.
Do the clergy not care? Do the office bearers not care? If local church leaders want to become relevant, they must begin to listen - they must begin to engage in some elementary research to inform their preaching and all their work.
Disillusioned, I've been disengaging for some years now. Maybe I should quit. But how can I give up completely? I am torn apart. I love the people, the office bearers and the clergy - but I also love the community outside the church, especially the poor in the community.
The institutional church is so frustrating. It's simply driving me crazy and making me very angry. I want to sit down and weep.
Female 36 years
For the last seven years I have attended a Pentecostal church. I came to realise that my theology differed somewhat from that of some of the people I sat next to week after week, but I never felt I had the freedom to express these differences openly for fear of being called deceived (which did happen) or being branded a heretic.
I also had some difficulty accepting the autocratic style of leadership.
Church should be a place where a person is nurtured, and encouraged. A place which is safe, where one can express one's creativity and ask questions without fear. Alas, all too often it is a place which is narrow in its thinking, suspicious, and not accepting of people's eccentricities.
So for now I no longer attend church. Now, when I meet with like-minded (and even not-like-minded) individuals who are lovers of Christ, I say this is church. You don't have to be in a church building to pray with others, worship with others, laugh or cry with others, but you do need to be in a relationship with people.
After being in the 'safe' confines of the church for so long (over fifteen years) leaving was a big decision. Suddenly the boundary lines that church culture has in place (telling you what you can and cannot do) were no longer there. It is a risky business, but satisfying when you make decisions for yourself, rather than having them made for you.
Male 25 years
My decision to leave church was a necessary step in a journey which started almost three years ago when I realised that I had a truckload of Christian knowledge and yet didn't really know what I believed. This was a little unsettling for someone who had been brought up a Christian and had followed it through diligently, including going on three outreaches overseas.
Church became less and less a place for me to grow and be inspired, and more of a place for me to endure irrelevant teachings and worship which I couldn't seem to participate in. Church, for me, became part of the problem rather than part of the solution.
It is as if I'm going through a spiritual adolescence, wanting to grow up. The church seems to want to keep me in a dependent parent/child relationship. I rebel against that pressure but, like some teenagers, don't have the strength to claim my freedom to grow and take responsibility while I'm still attending church.
Therefore, unless I wished to remain a child, I needed to leave 'home'. Hopefully, as I grow stronger, I will be able to enter into a more adult to adult relationship with the church, without feeling overpowered by the inherent (and, dare I say it, un-Christlike) power of that institution. If Jesus came today, could he bring himself to be aligned with the institution of Christianity?
When I decided to leave the church, it was one of the most freeing, yet most scary decisions I've made thus far. I decided to throw away the composite of realities that had been given to me to believe in, and discover what was actually real for me. What was scary was that I had very little reality with God to call my own. I have truly had to start again from scratch.
Female 53 years
In church I feel like I'm going over old ground. I feel I've moved on from what is being discussed. When I return to church it is for the communion service alone. The sermons don't even touch me any more, they seem to have no substance. When I look around and see the same people still sitting in the pews with the same things being discussed I realise that if I do start attending church regularly again I will become frustrated and that will only lead to criticism which I don't want to get into.
Once all my energy went into working in groups within the church, and that felt right and proper. But now I feel God wants me out in the community working alongside everyday people sharing my gifts, where people are interested in what I have to share rather than fighting me for my differences.
I do miss the singing at church, and the sharing of my faith with others, but I feel deeply sad that the church has not been able to move fast enough to keep up with the changes that have occurred in the 20th century.
I still believe that God created the world and bestowed his gifts on his people; we live each moment in his blessings. I believe that Jesus is the saviour of the world and is constantly redeeming his people. I believe God's Holy Spirit works through me in all that I do with other people. I believe his light goes out to those I work with and that people catch the wonder and joy and power. They become curious about what I have to share, without me having to speak in a Christian language to them.
May God continue to be with all those who have left the church not really wanting to, but feeling that they have to, rather than staying constantly frustrated with the possibility of becoming very critical.
posted by The Happy Phanthom at 11:28 AM
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